The Come-Up

Blueprint to Broke Your Ass

No fluff. No hand-holdin’.

Just raw strategy, custom gameplans, and high-performance sh*t warfare.

The Come-Up

Blueprint to Broke Your Ass

No fluff. No hand-holdin’.

Just raw strategy, custom gameplans, and high-performance sh*t warfare.

1-on-1 Coach-ing That Hits Hard

  • Built custom for YOU — not no cookie-cutter guru BS

  • Long game only — this ain’t no magic pill, it’s a grind

  • Big results. Fair price. Straight up.

 

Whether you just steppin’ into the creative jungle, stuck in a midlife meltdown, or ownin’ a business that’s gaspin’ for direction — I’ll help you break the fog, get unstuck, and move like a savage with a plan.

Tail-ored Like a Bullet to Your Brain

We ain’t doin’ vague. You talk, I dig. We break down where you at — brand, biz, mindset, the whole mess. Then we build a plan that’s tight, ruthless, and made to fck sht up (in a good way).

We Meet When It Mad

Wanna meet every week? Cool. Need time to move before the next sesh? Also cool. We roll on your rhythm — as long as the progress don’t sleep.

Before We Link Up

I need 3–5 hot topics from you — the real stuff. Send me your site, socials, anything that helps me scan your vibe. I’ll pull up with a POV and heat loaded. No time wasted.


 

We Meet on Zoom (Obvi-ously)

All sessions go down on Zoom.
Video & audio files? Yours to keep. In case you need to replay the slaps later.

Fees

$400/hr. No BS contracts. No lock-ins. Wanna go long? Cop a 10-pack retainer and get 10% off. (Hit me up before bookin’ if you thinkin’ big.)

Free 20-min Disco-very Zoom

Wanna feel the energy before you drop the bag? Book a quick 20-min face-to-face and let’s see if our wavelengths sync.

 

NOTE: This ain’t a coaching sesh. It’s a vibe check.

Sh*t I Spec-ialize In?

  • Personal Brand That Hits

  • Getting Clients Without Beggin’

  • Business Gameplan That Ain’t Fluff

  • Real-World Networking Tactics

  • Guerrilla Marketing Moves

  • Content Creation That Don’t Miss

  • Content Marketing w/ Bite

  • Confidence That Don’t Fold

  • Time & Energy Control Like a Boss

  • Creative Career Guidance w/ Edge

$400 USD

Pay to level up. Or stay mid. Your call.

Or cry in your inbox while other people outgrow you.

$400 USD

Pay to level up. Or stay mid. Your call.

Or cry in your inbox while other people outgrow you.

Alien Mind Hacker

Philip Van Dusen

Reality Alchemist / Grind Shaper / From The Another Planet

With 25+ years — grindin’ in the game as a creative boss, Philip’s been runnin’ sh*t in strategic branding and design for the biggest global players out there. Dude’s been holdin’ it down for top-tier retailers, product giants, and branding legends — straight up killin’ the game from both the client’s crib and the agency’s hustle. As the head honcho of Verhaal Brand Design, his New Jersey-based brand squad hooks up international clients with killer brand strategies, slick graphic designs, and marketing moves — that slap hard worldwide. Before bossin’ his own shop, Philip rocked the VP of Design chair at PepsiCo’s Global Snacks, ran the design show at Old Navy, and flexed major creative muscle as Executive Creative Director at Landor Associates — the OG branding legends. His client list reads like a who’s who of the corporate jungle: Pepsico, P&G, Kraft, Merck, Petsmart, Safeway, Chevron, Levi’s, Microsoft, Campbell’s, Johnson & Johnson — and a whole lot more.

No dumb bullsh*t. This is streetwise of sh*t hustle — where your brands get built or get buried. → [email protected]

philip vandusen

Alien Mind Hacker

Philip Van Dusen

Reality Alchemist / Grind Shaper / From The Another Planet

With 25+ years — grindin’ in the game as a creative boss, Philip’s been runnin’ sh*t in strategic branding and design for the biggest global players out there. Dude’s been holdin’ it down for top-tier retailers, product giants, and branding legends — straight up killin’ the game from both the client’s crib and the agency’s hustle. As the head honcho of Verhaal Brand Design, his New Jersey-based brand squad hooks up international clients with killer brand strategies, slick graphic designs, and marketing moves — that slap hard worldwide. Before bossin’ his own shop, Philip rocked the VP of Design chair at PepsiCo’s Global Snacks, ran the design show at Old Navy, and flexed major creative muscle as Executive Creative Director at Landor Associates — the OG branding legends. His client list reads like a who’s who of the corporate jungle: Pepsico, P&G, Kraft, Merck, Petsmart, Safeway, Chevron, Levi’s, Microsoft, Campbell’s, Johnson & Johnson — and a whole lot more.

No dumb bullsh*t. This is streetwise — of sh*t hustle where your brands.

↓ Get built or get buried ↓ [email protected]

philip vandusen

You Broke 'Cause Your Dumb Sh*t Runs on Expired.exe

You Broke 'Cause Your Dumb Sh*t Runs on Expired.exe

Ex-Losers Who Finally Got Tired of Losing

Ex-Losers Who Finally Got Tired of Losing

More Sh*t You Probably Need

More Sh*t You Probably Need

We break

artists into icons.

If you still feel small, that’s not on us!

We’re not for everyone. Just the ones who aren’t afraid to – outgrow themselves.

© SNUF is FUNS 2023

Snuf is Funs

US Node A/D/O by MINI
29 Norman Ave, Brooklyn, NY 11222, USA

Our East Coast creative lab.Mostly used for staring at walls, typing without clients, and waiting for AI to hallucinate.

We break

artists into icons.

If you still feel small, that’s not on us!

We’re not for everyone. Just the ones who aren’t afraid to – outgrow themselves.

© SNUF is FUNS 2023

Snuf is Funs

US Node A/D/O by MINI
29 Norman Ave, Brooklyn, NY 11222, USA

Our East Coast creative lab.Mostly used for staring at walls, typing without clients, and waiting for AI to hallucinate.

Copyright Disclaimer

All content, concepts, design assets, linguistic weaponry, sonic distortions, visual propaganda, and cognitive frameworks published under the SNUF is FUNS label are the exclusive intellectual property of this entity — however shapeshifted it may be.Unauthorized reproduction, repurposing, or appropriation — especially by mid creatives pretending to be edgy — will be considered both a legal and spiritual offense. We protect our work like cult relics. Copy, and we’ll know. Copy again, and we’ll haunt your next project.

 

Creative Licensing

Select works are open for ritual collaboration under specific terms. We operate on hybrid licensing models combining Creative Commons-esque ethics with underground distribution tactics. You want access? Bring blood and vision. Ask first. Steal later and pay the price.

 

Use of This Website

You may browse. You may click. But don’t confuse visibility with permission. Every pixel here is a sigil — designed, coded, and deployed for impact. Nothing here is casual. Every asset is tracked. Every visitor, logged. The cult watches.

 

Final Note

SNUF is FUNS is not a legally registered agency. It’s an aesthetic, a fracture in reality, and a hyper-aware visual entity operating across borders. Still wanna send a cease & desist? Good luck serving papers to a mirage.

 

 

 

We own nothing. We own everything. Especially your attention. ”

Copyright Disclaimer

All content, concepts, design assets, linguistic weaponry, sonic distortions, visual propaganda, and cognitive frameworks published under the SNUF is FUNS label are the exclusive intellectual property of this entity — however shapeshifted it may be.Unauthorized reproduction, repurposing, or appropriation — especially by mid creatives pretending to be edgy — will be considered both a legal and spiritual offense. We protect our work like cult relics. Copy, and we’ll know. Copy again, and we’ll haunt your next project.

 

Creative Licensing

Select works are open for ritual collaboration under specific terms. We operate on hybrid licensing models combining Creative Commons-esque ethics with underground distribution tactics. You want access? Bring blood and vision. Ask first. Steal later and pay the price.

 

Use of This Website

You may browse. You may click. But don’t confuse visibility with permission. Every pixel here is a sigil — designed, coded, and deployed for impact. Nothing here is casual. Every asset is tracked. Every visitor, logged. The cult watches.

 

Final Note

SNUF is FUNS is not a legally registered agency. It’s an aesthetic, a fracture in reality, and a hyper-aware visual entity operating across borders. Still wanna send a cease & desist? Good luck serving papers to a mirage.

 

 

 

“ We own nothing. We own everything. Especially your attention. ”